no!!!

well have been quite moody lately.. thats becos ive just found out that i may have to fly off to pearce next month.. its like less than 3 weeks from now la.. totally out of time to do the things i wanna do.. to see the ppl i wanna see and to enjoy my life before i step into the horrid phase that awaits me.. well it may not be that horrid like wad mr nordin liked to say but it'll be quite a significant transition.. had not actually thought abt going for BWC before until now partly becos i thought i'd only go in jan and also i didnt want to worry myself.. well but now, i have no choice.. 9 months away from where ive grew up all my life is gonna be hard... already tamworth was bad even though it was only 1 month and 1 week.. missed mel SOOO much and like aft the days sortie i would just go back to my room, switch on my com and listen to the soothing type of music that would like just make you feel worse and so much more home-sick and love-sick.. untill ive no idea why i did that.. wads more i liked to open the sliding door to the balcony and just sit there and stone.. i loved to stone... i never knew stoning could be so relaxing.. well i guess that experiences like this really get ur mind back on track.. to remind u of the impt things in life that you may have taken for granted. things have happened this past few weeks that i never knew and expected to happen to me.. guess sometimes you need to know ur weaknesses and guard urself cos i now know wad happens when you dont.. i wont go into the details cos you will definately go 'wad are you kidding me??!!!'. yup its quite bad.. tink many ppl have been quite disappointed with me.. am disappointed with myself even more cos i was the one who allowed myself to enter that stupid ditch that i eventually found myself trying to climb out of.. but thank God for his wisdom man.. sometimes you think abt the stupid things you can do and you go like 'wad were you thinking man!'. think mel was yelling that at me too.. sigh.. well that is over.. it doesnt look like its affected me but it has.. im still in the stages of getting over it.. i will get over it.. its difficult but thankfully mel has been there for me.. a great gift that God has given to me.. where others would have done otherwise, she stayed and spoke sense into me.. i think trust is very impt in any relationship especially ones like mine where the two are apart for so long.. too long if you ask me.. but actually, yong tat's training as a WSO fighter is much worse.. his away for 2 yrs! but i know that both of them will work out.. the wonders of skype ah! haha..

so its all gonna start in sept if i go.. hate being the first reserve.. neither here nor there.. not sure if i should start to fully prepare myself mentally but i guess i dont have a choice.. just prep.. alot of checks leh!! you cant imagine but F16 has more la so cant complain.. haha..

studying aerodynamics now.. exam on friday and i havent even read the notes properly yet.. haha! had GFET today and hit 8gs.. quite an experience i must say.. first time that my ass hurt so much.. actually 6 and 8 gs feel almost the same but you can see that with the same technique, you'll definately loc when you're doing the 8. i was like greying out and i gave all i could give in my legs and thank god it all came back.. haha.. if you dont know wad im talking abt its the centifuge that spins ard with a stupid guy sitting inside doing the anti g straining manuoeve.. not fun if you ask me.. all my gyros got screwed up and hate that feeling..

alright going back to my aerody notes now.. the final push towards the end of ground sch.. and then to perth aust.. take care
God Bless!